I am finally all scheduled up for my HSG test, ya know that thing that they put in side of me and then shoot dye into me until I get uncomfortable and then take pictures ;) Sounds like fun right? I'll admit it... I am
scared to death a little nervous. Although I have heard the bark is worse than the bite on this one. Apparently they (as in the doctor and the whole nursing staff) say its like having bad period cramps but a little worse. Worse? Ha! They haven't experienced my period cramps! lol! Don't worry I'm sure I will blog all about it. ;) I am currently shaking my head to the irony of this whole situation and laughing at how now it is my turn to experience the uncomfortableness that I have been an accomplice to causing... I'm sure some would say "serves her right" lol. I just hope that I'm right and its no big deal. Either way... I'm having it done... I NEED to know WTF is up with my body... I need to know why I am not pregnant by now. That in itself is frustrating. I understand it takes a while... that "practice make perfect" and that the more I stress about it the more it can hinder me... but this is ridiculous. I feel like something is wrong... I honestly believe that no matter how much I were to just relax and let things happen, they would never happen. I know this because, this is not my first rodeo in trying to get pregnant. I had been married before my husband that I have now for 4 years, and we dated while I was in high school. Not once, had I ever even had a "close call"... again it makes me wonder... wouldn't it make you wonder? Now 10 years later here I am and still no baby to show for... can you imagine my frustration? Close your eyes... picture your worst fear... dwell on it for 10 years and that is pinch of what I feel like just about everyday. Imagine walking into clinic after clinic seeing nothing but happy "mom's to be" with their beautiful baby bumps or newly born children and you being the defective one. Imagine friends and relatives and sometimes strangers seeing your daughter turn 5 years old and saying "better start working on another one, before she gets TOO old!" Sounds like it sucks doesn't it? But this is not a pitty me post... I swear... I just want to reveal how it really is... this is my struggle, this is my strife, this is my burden to carry on my own... BUT IT WILL NOT OWN ME! All I ask is... if you pray... please say one for me, if you believe in magic... please blow a little baby dust my way, if your a Hare Krishna... then by Hare dance and sing away! I can use all the hope in the world next Thursday for a positive outcome of my test. Till then I shall keep you all posted on this baby adventure...
MY FINGERS AND TOES AND LEGS AND ARMS AND EYES ARE CROSSED THAT THINGS GO SMOOTHLY AND YOU GET SOME GOOD NEWS!!! <3
ReplyDeleteThanks Ashley! <3 Same goes for you!!!
ReplyDeleteHi - sorry to hear about your struggles. I am {sort of} going through something similar. My story: haven't had a regular period since 16, been to see a number of doctors, who all tested different hormones, and came to the conclusion that everything was probably fine, but I may need help getting preggo. Now we are ready to get preggo, and I just moved so I needed a new doc. Decided that I would try to see if I could get a reproductive endocrinologist/fert specialist to be my ob/gyn - fortunately, found one whose wife was in the practice as an ob/gyn. She gave me an ultrasound and determined that I have Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome (PCOS) - doing some preps to do blood work to confirm. Apparently not too many standard ob/gyns diagnose it, but I am ready a book called the Patients Guide to PCOS by Dr. Walter Futterweit (ironically all the books I found and fertility specialists I found are written by/are men. May be another possibility, and I will definitely be blowing baby dust, happy thoughts and prayers your way. Good luck.
ReplyDeleteI completely understand. We tried for seven years. I hope that you get good news and that it doesn't suck too bad. Pain wise.
ReplyDeleteaw! I'm praying for you!! hang in there {which I'm sure you heat a lot}
ReplyDeletePraying for ya :) I know a girl who was told she'd never get pregnant. 8 years later she got pregnant. While I've never been through that (I only wanted one) I do understand a little of what your going through. I pray everything turns out great for ya and that it's only something simple.
ReplyDeleteGood luck, hope you get some answers soon :)
ReplyDeleteGood luck! Hopefully you will get some good answers.
ReplyDeleteYou're going to do great! It isn't that bad. I promise. Did your dr prescribe you any pain meds? Mine prescribed me tylenol 800 to take before and a percocet to take after but I didn't need it. I was able to drive home afterwards. Also, I don't know if your doctor told you but you can become extremely fertile right after an HSG because its basically washing your ovaries. Mine was in Feb and I got pregnant in March. Coincidence? Maybe!
ReplyDeleteFirst of all, you are NOT defective!! There are plenty of reasons why you might not be getting pregnant, and I'm sure your docs will figure it out.
ReplyDeleteSecond, don't listen to strangers. They are idiots and hardly ever say the right thing.
And lastly, I love your outlook with the whole thing. :) Your positive attitude and self-advocacy are awesome, and I'll definitely be keeping my fingers crossed for you!
Thanks guys! Your support really means alot to me... you guys really are the BEST! Just knowing really care and support me is more than I could ever ask for! You guys really amaze me! :)
ReplyDeleteGood luck! At least you are doing something about it, even though it is going to be painful you are trying to find out why it is taking so long! Everything will work out, I will have all my fingers and toes crossed for you! Keep us updated!
ReplyDeleteI wish you the best of luck and hope you get some answers soon!
ReplyDeleteThanks for the comments back :-) I will keep my fingers crossed and baby dust in the air ~Barbara
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